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You know when that favorite band of yours comes on but it’s a song you’ve never heard and then you see that it’s from their new album and you love the song immediately it’s just beautiful and speaks to you but it speaks to you in what you’ve always wanted in what you were so close to having it says “this is what you were so close to having this is what your heart has been breaking over this, this is going to make you cry alone in your car for thirty minutes and then you’ll cry alone in your shower for an hour and then after all that you’ll feel empty and hopeless because you were so close to having it all.” That happened to me tonight, it was a beautiful song and it could have been a happy song if I wasn’t feeling like the whole universe has caved in on me and the oxygen in my lungs was running out. Anyways I’m having a rough month and I just want to be able to call you up and tell you everything and cry and then laugh and have you make everything better like you always use to do, but I can’t have that so I’ll tell myself it’ll be ok I’ll cry and then laugh at how pathetic and stupid I am and then I’ll go to sleep feeling empty and lost just like I have been for months now.

Nothing makes you feel like a shopaholic more than finding clothes in your closet you forgot you bought.. 😐

Things that suck about being sick.

1. Being sick
2. Coughing sneezing wheezing etc.
3.headaches
4.sleepiness
5. An all around gross feeling

But on the plus side I’ve been in bed all day watching shows sleeping at any time I want. tea and soup by the gallons and yeah I guess it has it’s pros and cons

I just want to scream and yell and rage text you.. Instead I’m giving up. Yup I quit.

I’m starting to kinda sorta feel like a grown up! It’s crazy! I have semi grown up clothes now and I have a job that pays my bills, because I actually have real grown up bills now and I still live at home with my parents! Uh okay so that part isn’t so grown up but statistically more young adults are living with their parents now so I’m not to worried.

Anyways I was really upset on my last post because well I’m freshly single from a very shockingly short relationship.. But I’m okay now I guess and moving on like a mature grown up!

Back to clothes.. I got a Dior sweater for $4.63 today at Goodwill ^_^ So yes its designer and vintage and fabulous! Also within the span of uh how ever long I’ve been single I’ve spent over $500 on clothes.. I do a lot of retail therapy and it gets out of control.. But I still paid my car payment, phone bill insurance and paid for gas for the past two months so I guess its not that out of control, right? right.

Aside from feeling kinda grown up and being an obvious shopaholic I’ve been working and planning a friends wedding shower and feeling like I’m doing something wrong since I’m not with someone and not planning my own wedding but I know there is a time for everything and that part of my life isn’t here yet. But man I really wish it was here already..

Also I went to the doctors today.. I am not a big fan of doctors.. dentists sure I love ‘em but like actual physical health doctors bleh.. Everything went fine but since I’m in my twenties they wanted to know if I wanted to get a pap-smear today or wait until my next visit, and as the big grown up girl that I am I said I’d like to wait until next year…. >_> so not so grown up.. I just wasn’t prepared for that today if I had gone in ready for that I would have said yes but I thought it would just be like you know a not so grown up lady parts doctor visit.. I’ll do it next year and I’ll feel even more grown up and look back at this post and laugh then write a new post of how silly I was this year. 

Mhmm that’s it for now lovely followers! 

I find myself crying on my drive home and laying in bed hating all the happy couples in the world.. I know we agreed to still be friends but I don’t feel like we are still friends :/

Well every song on the radio and every song on Iheartradio is about relationships… Mainly break ups… This is why recovering from a break is so hard :/ can this just stop being so terrible! I miss his clothes and the way they smell, the way he smells.. I miss is voice and his arms holding me. It’s only been 4 days and it just sucks more and more each day :/

I don’t get on here as much as I used to.. I work way to much to blog and it makes me sad. So I’m going to try and get back on the ball with my blogging

I don’t get on here as much as I used to.. I work way to much to blog and it makes me sad. So I’m going to try and get back on the ball with my blogging

Ugh I’m so stupid and upset! Only stupid cuz I’m upset.. And being upset is dumb… Well being upset isn’t dumb but what I’m upset about is dumb I shouldn’t even care but I do so much it’s stupid I told him I just wanted to be friends and I have a boy friend who isn’t him but now he post some pic of him and a girl and I’m all upset how stupid am I? Ugh whatever I’ll just get over it, it shouldn’t even upset me.

Maddie is the absolute best. I don’t even think she follows this blog of mine but I was all down and mopey and basically having a pity party for one because herself and two of my other friends couldn’t come over tomorrow and Erik is kinda irritating me.. And well I was just in a bad mood and she asked me if we could reschedule for an other time and basically I was still in a mood and was like “well I don’t know when I’ll have time off again for a while” and then she was just wonderful and asked if either Thursday or Friday would work and hopefully one of them will and I’ll get to see her and everything will be wonderful!

You know when that favorite band of yours comes on but it’s a song you’ve never heard and then you see that it’s from their new album and you love the song immediately it’s just beautiful and speaks to you but it speaks to you in what you’ve always wanted in what you were so close to having it says “this is what you were so close to having this is what your heart has been breaking over this, this is going to make you cry alone in your car for thirty minutes and then you’ll cry alone in your shower for an hour and then after all that you’ll feel empty and hopeless because you were so close to having it all.” That happened to me tonight, it was a beautiful song and it could have been a happy song if I wasn’t feeling like the whole universe has caved in on me and the oxygen in my lungs was running out. Anyways I’m having a rough month and I just want to be able to call you up and tell you everything and cry and then laugh and have you make everything better like you always use to do, but I can’t have that so I’ll tell myself it’ll be ok I’ll cry and then laugh at how pathetic and stupid I am and then I’ll go to sleep feeling empty and lost just like I have been for months now.

Nothing makes you feel like a shopaholic more than finding clothes in your closet you forgot you bought.. 😐

Things that suck about being sick.

1. Being sick
2. Coughing sneezing wheezing etc.
3.headaches
4.sleepiness
5. An all around gross feeling

But on the plus side I’ve been in bed all day watching shows sleeping at any time I want. tea and soup by the gallons and yeah I guess it has it’s pros and cons

I just want to scream and yell and rage text you.. Instead I’m giving up. Yup I quit.

I’m starting to kinda sorta feel like a grown up! It’s crazy! I have semi grown up clothes now and I have a job that pays my bills, because I actually have real grown up bills now and I still live at home with my parents! Uh okay so that part isn’t so grown up but statistically more young adults are living with their parents now so I’m not to worried.

Anyways I was really upset on my last post because well I’m freshly single from a very shockingly short relationship.. But I’m okay now I guess and moving on like a mature grown up!

Back to clothes.. I got a Dior sweater for $4.63 today at Goodwill ^_^ So yes its designer and vintage and fabulous! Also within the span of uh how ever long I’ve been single I’ve spent over $500 on clothes.. I do a lot of retail therapy and it gets out of control.. But I still paid my car payment, phone bill insurance and paid for gas for the past two months so I guess its not that out of control, right? right.

Aside from feeling kinda grown up and being an obvious shopaholic I’ve been working and planning a friends wedding shower and feeling like I’m doing something wrong since I’m not with someone and not planning my own wedding but I know there is a time for everything and that part of my life isn’t here yet. But man I really wish it was here already..

Also I went to the doctors today.. I am not a big fan of doctors.. dentists sure I love ‘em but like actual physical health doctors bleh.. Everything went fine but since I’m in my twenties they wanted to know if I wanted to get a pap-smear today or wait until my next visit, and as the big grown up girl that I am I said I’d like to wait until next year…. >_> so not so grown up.. I just wasn’t prepared for that today if I had gone in ready for that I would have said yes but I thought it would just be like you know a not so grown up lady parts doctor visit.. I’ll do it next year and I’ll feel even more grown up and look back at this post and laugh then write a new post of how silly I was this year. 

Mhmm that’s it for now lovely followers! 

I find myself crying on my drive home and laying in bed hating all the happy couples in the world.. I know we agreed to still be friends but I don’t feel like we are still friends :/

Well every song on the radio and every song on Iheartradio is about relationships… Mainly break ups… This is why recovering from a break is so hard :/ can this just stop being so terrible! I miss his clothes and the way they smell, the way he smells.. I miss is voice and his arms holding me. It’s only been 4 days and it just sucks more and more each day :/

I don’t get on here as much as I used to.. I work way to much to blog and it makes me sad. So I’m going to try and get back on the ball with my blogging

I don’t get on here as much as I used to.. I work way to much to blog and it makes me sad. So I’m going to try and get back on the ball with my blogging

Ugh I’m so stupid and upset! Only stupid cuz I’m upset.. And being upset is dumb… Well being upset isn’t dumb but what I’m upset about is dumb I shouldn’t even care but I do so much it’s stupid I told him I just wanted to be friends and I have a boy friend who isn’t him but now he post some pic of him and a girl and I’m all upset how stupid am I? Ugh whatever I’ll just get over it, it shouldn’t even upset me.

Maddie is the absolute best. I don’t even think she follows this blog of mine but I was all down and mopey and basically having a pity party for one because herself and two of my other friends couldn’t come over tomorrow and Erik is kinda irritating me.. And well I was just in a bad mood and she asked me if we could reschedule for an other time and basically I was still in a mood and was like “well I don’t know when I’ll have time off again for a while” and then she was just wonderful and asked if either Thursday or Friday would work and hopefully one of them will and I’ll get to see her and everything will be wonderful!

Things that suck about being sick.

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